The flu usually runs high this time of year. And, inevitably, this is also the time that my boys pick up the flu from their kindergarten school.

Normally, my husband and I take turns to be at home and see the boys through their sickness. Usually, this leads to my husband catching the cold as well, leaving only me to take care of them.

And just when everybody had been taken care of and are starting to get well once again, then it’s my turn…

Fever. Headache. Running nose. I hate being sick so bad…

I have already taken off so much time from work to take care of the rest of the family, and now I need to take more time off and postpone all my meetings yet again. It’s a viscous cycle!

I always try to be there for my family and take care of them. So I find it very difficult to be in a position where the tables have been turned – where they need to take care of me. It feels so awkward, almost like I don’t deserve it. I should be the one helping them, not the other way round!

It is also during this time that I notice how quickly my tolerance of cleanliness decreases. Usually I would be up most of the day cleaning behind the boys and keeping the house in order. But the moment I can’t do that any longer, any mess can really start to get on my nerves. I hate not being able to get up and get the house back in order.

Why does being sick and incapable bother me so much?

Here’s my theory.

You see, in my mind, I am supposed to be the strong one. I am supposed to be the one that never gets sick and always there to take care of the others. In my mind, I am a super-mom.

So when I get sick, my world falls apart.

This belief was passed on to me by my mother and grandmother. Like me, they too were strong women who always put others before themselves and who always strived to serve wherever they can. I really admire them, and I’m glad that I can follow in their footsteps!

I always wondered how they were able to be so strong for so long.

And then during my time of sickness this year, it hit me.

In order to take good care of my family all year long, I need to take care of myself too. I only have a limited amount of strength, and if I don’t look after it well enough, I too will fall sick.

Maybe this flu episode is just a message reminding me to take better care of myself, to look after myself more gently, and not to push myself so hard all the time.

Whenever you board an airplane, they always say, “First put on your own oxygen mask before helping others with theirs.” And I have come to realize the genius of this. If you take care of yourself first, you will have the strength to assist many others, far more than what you would have been capable of otherwise.

And so today I just need to relax. I need to calm down and allow my husband to take care of me and the children. I need to learn to trust him and let him take over the reins for a while until I get better.

I need to let him have his way (even though I know my way is far better – you see my problem?). I need to allow him to put on the red sweater instead of the blue one. I need to allow him to pack sausage rolls for the kids’ lunches instead of cheese sandwiches.

And then I need to turn a blind eye to the mess, ignore all the unwashed dishes in the sink, walk pass the mess of breadcrumbs underneath the table, and just take it easy. I need to make myself a cup of tea, get under a blanket, read a book, and allow myself to heal.

Because when I am finally well again, I will once again be able to meet all their needs – and even more!

Here’s a reminder for all the mothers out there:

You are allowed to take care of yourself and relax a bit!